Hello, friends. I've been wanting to share something personal with you all - a story that might surprise you, but one that I think speaks to experiences many of us have had with beauty standards and religious expectations.
From Joseph Smith's Family to Beauty Pageant Pressure
If you’re new to this site, you might not know this, but I'm actually the great, great grandniece of Joseph Smith, the founder of the Mormon Church. Pretty wild, right? Growing up in that world gave me a front-row seat to something I've been thinking about a lot lately: the intense pressure on Mormon women to achieve physical perfection.
Utah's Surprising Secret: Beauty by the Numbers
Here's a stat that might blow your mind - Utah, the heart of Mormon culture, has more plastic surgeons per capita than any other state in the US. As someone who grew up in this environment, I can tell you this isn't just a random coincidence.
Growing Up Smith: Beauty Standards at Home
Let me paint you a picture of what it was like. Picture teenage me, being nudged toward beauty pageants to show my "righteousness" and attract a good Mormon husband. Meanwhile, my mom was doing these brutal lemon juice and cayenne pepper fasts after each of her nine pregnancies, trying to maintain what my dad called her "wedding weight." Two of my sisters ended up struggling with eating disorders. Being a Smith meant appearance wasn't just important - it was everything
When Looking Good Becomes a Religious Duty
But here's the thing - this isn't just my family's story. Throughout Mormon culture, there's this fascinating and troubling connection between spiritual worth and physical beauty. Young women learn early on that looking good isn't just about personal choice - it's practically a spiritual duty. Imagine being told that your appearance is somehow linked to your worthiness before God. Heavy stuff, right?
Instagram Perfect: Mormon Influencer Culture
And in today's social media age? Don't even get me started on Mormon mommy bloggers and influencers! They've taken this pressure to a whole new level, showing off this picture-perfect version of Mormon womanhood - flawless looks, perfect homes, multiple kids, and somehow making it all look effortless.
The Hidden Price of Perfection: Depression
But here's the kicker - all this focus on looking perfect exists in a church where women have limited institutional power. No priesthood, few leadership positions - but hey, you better look amazing! It's no wonder Utah has some of the highest rates of antidepressant use, particularly among Mormon women.
Breaking Free and Speaking Out
I left the church at nineteen after learning some hard truths about its history, but the impact of growing up in this environment stuck with me. That's why I'm speaking out now. Because whether you're Mormon or not, I think many of us can relate to feeling pressured to look a certain way to be considered "worthy" - whether that's in religious circles, professional life, or social media.
I'm sharing my story in more detail in my upcoming memoir, "We Were Smiths: Escaping the Shadow of Joseph Smith's Mormon Legacy." But I wanted to start this conversation with you all first. Because I think it's time we talked about how religious and cultural expectations about beauty affect women's sense of worth - and what we can do to change that conversation.
What do you think? Have you experienced similar pressures in your own life or community? I'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences.
Want to continue this conversation? You can find me on YouTube at "Heretic Survivor: From Mormon to Me," or follow me on Instagram and Facebook
Love,
Lyn
